Why Can’t I Forget My Ex?

So you broke up with your ex and you cannot stop thinking about them, when you are at work, when you’re at home, when your song comes on the radio, socially and maybe you bump into them all time like when you drop the kids off.

You keep going back to memories of them or just thinking of what they are doing, who are they with.

All these incessant thoughts make you feel Anxious, angry, sad, helpless, worthless, Not good enough, unlovable, hopeless etc… and you don’t know what to do.

This could be going on for months or even years and you cannot move on with your life you're just going through the motions and avoiding a new relationship because you have no room with all this going on.

Maybe you have gone to your doctor a psychologist, councillor tried drugs nothing works. It just seems to be getting worse the longer it goes on not better. How do I get out of this hell?

The Solution to This Is Simple and It Works

Here I am going to describe why this is happening and why you cannot move on and what can be done to fix this so you can move on with your life so you can start living your life again.

The solution to this problem is your emotions! More specifically the emotions you have associated with your ex.

How We Work

To start off we need some basic understanding of how as individuals we work. This involves an understanding of the mind, emotions and how they work within our bodies.

What Are Emotions

Emotions are made of two things thoughts and thoughts are made up of Images, colour, movies, sound, dialogue, talking to ourselves and others in our heads. The second part of emotions is a physical sensation, sometimes people will say I have butterflies in my stomach to represent anxiety, you might get a really tight chest when you get angry. People who have panic attacks have extreme physical sensations like; sweating, shaking, dizziness, pins and needles, heart racing, burning and many more. Most of the physical sensations in your body you are completely unaware of you are just present to the emotion.

The reason why you are unaware of these sensations because when they happen they may be mild and over time you get used to it and eventually you can no longer feel it. It has become subconscious outside your conscious awareness. Think of wearing a watch for the first time at first you can feel it all the time then after a couple of weeks of wearing a watch you can no longer feel the watch the sensation of it on your wrist has become subconscious.

So emotions are made up of thoughts and physical sensations in the body.

Anchoring Emotions

Well, that is a strange term to use another one you may be more familiar with is triggers.

Now I don't know if you know this but you store every emotion you've ever experienced in your entire life in your body and it is anchored to your memories, so when you go back to the good memories you feel good and when you go back to your bad ones well you don't.

Now emotions we anchor to everything so you can anchor them to various different types of objects, you can anchor them to people, tones of voices, words, locations or time - time of day, time of the week, time of the month, time of the year everything even things that aren’t real like concepts like voting, politics give me a pound of politics, well you cant it doesn't exist its not real but you still have an emotional response to the word.

Over time as you go back to the same memories or same thoughts of your ex you are re-accessing the emotions already anchored to the memory and you also add new emotions to the memory, slowly building up and emotional charge of the memory.

Emotions Accumulate over Time

Emotions tend to accumulate over time in our bodies because every time you feel some intense emotion you anchor it to the memory of the event and store in your body, also you tend to get better at doing those emotions over time the more you practice them. So imagine that your emotions are on a scale of 1-10. Lets say as a child your anxiety level was a 2 but as you get older practice doing that emotion, and your also storing that emotion in your body anchored to memories and as you get older the level will rise from a 2 upwards to say at 4 and a few years later a 6 and it continues to climb as you get older.

Now let’s say you’re at an anxiety level 5 well the thing is you will be at this level 24 hours a day 7 days a week. You may fluctuate around this level but even when you're asleep you will be at this level.

This cannot be stopped this is how we operate we learn emotions as children subconsciously then we practice doing those emotions, and storing those emotions in our bodies subconsciously it all happens outside of our conscious awareness and control. The speed at which the level increases varies from person to person, depending on that individual and their life circumstances, people who suffer trauma will have their levels increase more rapidly than those who don’t.

So every time you think of your ex or go back to memories of your ex your accumulating and anchoring more emotions to those memories and thoughts, slowly increasing the emotion anchored to those memories or thoughts.

The more emotion you have anchored to your ex the more you will tend to think about them, so over time, you may start to think of them more and more as you slowly anchor more emotions to them, which in turn makes you think of them more often, its a bit of a trap.

How to Forget Your Ex

So the only way possible to forget your ex is to remove or disconnect all emotions associated with your ex, all the memories and all the thoughts. Can you think of an acquaintance that you bump into every now and then maybe you talk to them maybe you don’t maybe it is someone you see on the train going to work, well you don’t have many emotions associated with them so you don’t think of them ever except when you see them and you don’t think of them much or for long.

So by removing the emotions from your ex, from all memories and thoughts of them these thoughts and memories will stop crossing your mind, you will still remember everything but you will just stop thinking of those thoughts or memories even though they still exist.

So as you can see emotions are the cause and solution to your problem.

So How Do I Remove Emotions Anchored to My Ex?

Well, the only way I know that this can be achieved is through using NLP and Hypnotherapy, but be careful not all hypnotherapists practising Hypnotherapy know how to work with emotions and remove them.

As a Hypnotherapist, I was lucky to be taught by someone who knew how to work with emotions, and I have helped many people with all sorts of problems including forgetting your'e ex by removing anchored emotions from their problems.

These days I am seeing more and more people for this problem, and help them forget their ex so they can move on with their life.

P.S. This works for anyone you want to forget not just your Ex.

Learn More on Forgetting Your'e Ex?

Would you like to learn more on how Synergy hypnotherapy can help you eliminate thoughts of your Ex and related problems? So you can feel more relaxed, happy being able to cope with life easier, things just won't bother you like they used to. Then visit our Relationship service's page or...

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